Exiling "should" from my running vocabulary

Before my recent face-to-face sympathy session with the repair guy, I had another virtual sympathy session, this time with a post from Susan Lacke.

In "There Is No 'Should' In Running," Susan recounts a conversation she had with a friend who'd just completed a half marathon.

This friend, like other runners Susan's talked to, said with some resignation that she guessed she'd have to do a marathon next. To this view, Susan responds: "You don’t have to do anything. Do you want to run a marathon?"

The post goes on to defend all distances as being perfectly acceptable to qualify you as a "real runner." But that part wasn't what spoke to me — it was the line excerpted above.

As you may or may not remember, I decided that this year's goal would be to at least consider running a marathon, and I've explained it as "if I'm going to do it, I should think about doing it now, with a child-free life and a 40-hour workweek."

But while struggling mostly mentally, sometimes physically, this spring, I've thought about how the hurdles are twice as large from a half marathon to a full ... and it's made me 99.5 percent sure I won't be trying a marathon this year, or, honestly, any year.

After reading Susan's column, though, that conclusion seemed less gloomy. The answer to "do you want to run a marathon?" is no.

And man, there is a huge difference between, say, going to a movie you don't actually want to see all that badly, and running a distance twice what you've ever done when you don't want to.

I didn't even fall short on my goal of "think about doing a marathon," because I did think about it. Having the most time and fitness that I'm likely to have just doesn't translate to having the desire.

I have to cancel my grumpy post

Among the entries that were percolating in December but never came to fruition was one centered on the idea that I might be doing everything running-related wrong.

This was born of a New York Times Well blog post titled "For Athletes, Risks From Ibuprofen Use" and then nurtured by another post a week later titled "Why Afternoon May Be The Best Time To Exercise."

If you haven't guessed or don't follow, I do use ibuprofen, and I've significantly cut back on afternoon runs (in favor of morning or evening ones) since leaving my second-shift job.

So reading these posts while worn down from a year-plus of running without significant interruption caused some out-of-proportion irritation.

(Never mind that at the end of the afternoon running post, the experts concede they're not sure how the mouse research translates to human behavior, and that the most important thing is to exercise, period. And never mind that the ibuprofen article focused mainly on the gross risks of popping the pills right before working out, which I've never done.)

Obviously, I never got around to writing that post until now — when, refreshed by a week of just resting, I don't care. Absence is definitely making this heart, so eager to take a break, fonder of running.

And the payoff of this admiration from afar is that all the snazzy workout recommendations in the blogs I read and the latest Runner's World magazine, plus those two aforementioned lectures, are no longer fostering inferiority complexes, insecurities, defeatist attitudes or straight-up fear for my health.

Instead, it's psyching me up for 2013. (Goals to come later; I'm ambitious not only for this year but for the planning of this year.)

I knew that the rest I needed was both mental and physical, but I think now — with the clarity that extra sleep brings! — that I'd underestimated how much of it was mental.

The final step back into my routine

Yesterday was a day full of back-to-normal activities. I drove, and on the right-hand side of the road. I spent American dollars. I took a long shower without flip-flops. And I went on a run.

As I shuffled up the road outside my apartment, my pace was deliberately slow for two reasons: the wind and the rust. I'd spent six days in London, sandwiched by a full day of travel on either side. And then it occurred to me that I didn't remember the last time I'd been on a run (excepting my failed attempt to grab a departing train).

The last true run before my Oct. 29 effort, it turns out, was Oct. 17. The following two days, I had meant to run, but life got in the way, and then after that it was either travel preparations or the actual trip (which, I had already decided, would not feature a run).

I felt a bit of regret, knowing it would put me behind on my 1,000-mile challenge, but it seemed like my Google Reader had been trying to send me a message. All the running blogs I follow were extolling the virtues of rest ... so I embraced my 7.5-mile week.

Still, it's a bit scary — at least for this nonnatural runner — to go so long without running. Each day that passes after a run seems to chip away at my motivation to get back out there; I'd taken nearly two weeks off. (Which isn't to say I was lazy — I estimated that I walked 22 miles over the course of my trip.)

Thank God yesterday's run went off with only the expected hitches, or, rather, stitches. I lost my breath and stride at the same spots I always do on this particular route, no matter what shape I'm in.

Once I hit the flat final stretch, I was mostly fine — I knew there'd be another run after this one. No pain, only mild and fleeting discomfort; no anger; and no excessive sweat (less than normal, in fact).

I'm unequivocally glad now that I took that time off. I had a few aches before I did, and I'm sure they'll return if I ramp up the mileage again, but I hadn't given myself the summer break I'd been used to in 2010 and 2011. Maybe fall break was a must for those muscles and joints.

And given the mild yearning I felt while watching Londoners run, my mind might've needed the time away to grow fonder, too.

Web wrap-up: June 11 to 17

As you can see from the right side of my page, I keep tabs on several running bloggers who post frequently and engagingly.

Halfway through my Get Running days, I began using their best stuff as launchpads for my own posts. While I expect to continue that, I can't always build off what they've done — sometimes because I can't relate, sometimes because there's nothing more (or more eloquent) to say.

Three of that type of post have cropped up recently, and because I anticipate plenty more to come, I decided to mimic other bloggers and start a post compilation feature. This has nothing to do with the fact that writers experience creative blocks at times, or that sporty folks get sleepy, or that people who work office jobs sometimes become burned out on computer screens after putting in a day's work.

The timing does, however, have a slight relation to the weather forecast. It's not looking good for my running chances today: We're expecting highs in the upper 90s and heat indexes in the mid-100s. Send chilly thoughts my way today and tomorrow, please.

run this amazing day: on recovery. Katie is a triathlete in Alexandria, Va., one who's serious enough to hire coaches and who seems pretty competitive. This post (from June 6, but I read it sometime between June 11 and 17, so it's sneaking in) talks about how she used to cheat on her recovery time — she'd do a workout early Wednesday morning and then another on Thursday night — but eventually got smarter and learned to embrace a full lazy day between workouts.

I generally don't have a problem taking rest days; I just have a problem not feeling guilty about them and not endlessly justifying why I won't be running/biking that day. Last Friday, though, I overcame that: After a 31-mile bike ride Thursday, with a busy Friday planned, there was no doubt in my mind about the wisdom of resting. It felt good. Decisiveness is a rare, but pleasant, feeling for me.

Out There: Race Photos. Susan Lacke isn't the first person to write about ugly race photos (Runner's World's Mark Remy has made a full-fledged meme out of his own), but she turned out a great post about it. My favorite part:

"Perhaps the most outlandish thing about these horrendous race photos? I buy them. Yes ... I actually pay money to have documented proof of my ... er ... attractiveness."

Doug's irunnerbuzz: Not running in the Rockford half and other schtuff: Doug is probably my most devoted fan who's not related to me. I'd hoped to say hello/goodbye to him at the race in his blog post's title, but I never saw him. I learned in this post that he'd made a 12:30 a.m. conditioning-related call to skip the race. Having made a 5:30 a.m. conditioning- and family-issue-related call to skip a race in October 2011, I empathize 100 percent ... and also feel less embarrassed for having done so.